Two Big Announcements

Posted in blog post on May 4th, 2011 by Merrill Markoe

Okay, two announcements.  I think I said that already. Only the other time I added the word big.

1. I am now on Facebook. I resisted as long as I could in the name of being a life long contrarian.  But now I have taken the plunge. So if you would like to friend me, please feel free. I am listed under my name: Merrill Markoe. And I will probably say yes unless you are an annoying psycho.

2. I have a new book coming out in November. Its a book of funny essays. And its definitely my most personal set of essays ever. Years of writing novels have opened a trap door that is now impossible to close. I hope its stuff that the people who like my other books will want to read.

If there’s a theme to the book, its the never ending task of coping with the crazy people who surround us all. ( I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one who is surrounded by crazy people. Am I? I’m not, am I?)  I have been trying to learn something, anything, from these experiences, since, as I understand it, that seems to be kind of the point. And for the sake of the book,  I’m going to go ahead and assume there is a point.

For example, the book contains  a piece about my problematic relationship with my extremely critical seemingly un-pleasable mother and the odd, thoroughly irritable travel diaries that I saw for the first time after she died.  I quote from them ver batim, which made me pretty nervous. But having gotten laughs  the few times I got up the nerve to read from them on stage, I was encouraged to turn them in to an essay that tries to add up the pieces and draw some conclusions , now that its over.

There’s  an exhaustively thorough piece I began writing as a present to some of my  girl friends, as I sit back watching them  running headlong in to the endless variations of the miseries that dating has to offer.  Its based on a lifetime of  note taking as I lived through my own version of same. Its called “How to Spot an Asshole.” and I’m pretty sure  I didn’t leave anything out.

There’s also a piece called ‘Never Again’ about the nerve wracking experience of falling in love again after swearing off love entirely. And the difference between having this experience  in the first half of life, and  in the second half.

Of course there are also a few pieces about dogs, because they are the craziest people of all.   I analyze why I love them with so much unswerving devotion, considering that they require me to tolerate behavior I will no longer tolerate from people.

I guess I’ll say more about this whole thing as it gets closer to November.

I hope its a good book . You can pre-order it already, I’m told. Its for sale on Amazon and Barnes and Noble and Borders Books all the rest of the regular places that still sell what we, the creatures from the previous century, still laughingly refer to as ‘books’.  The publisher is, once again, Randomhouse.

And those are my two big announcements.

Now back to our regularly scheduled programming:

So today you’re saying he was unarmed and wasn’t actually using a woman as a human shield?

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9 Responses to “Two Big Announcements”

  1. Margaret says:

    I’m all pre-ordered and I can’t wait to read your essays. November seems like half a year away, doesn’t it? But you know how time passes at the same rate all the time so when the time comes, it will probably feel like it’s been six months or so.

    Question regarding your new Facebook friend policy and annoying psychos – those of us who were your friend before you stated these guidelines…will we be grandfathered in?

    • Everyone who was already my Facebook friend will be de-friended. Then I will have my staff of private detectives do what they do best. And depending on the collected data, or dossier as I like to call it, I will re-friend. But this time it will be much friend-ier than before. The annoying psychos among you will be placed in a separate category that involves 24 hour surveillance. My close friend Steve Jobs has assured me that this will be no problem.

  2. John says:

    Well, that explains the dream I had last night, wherein people kept pointing at me and saying “Markoe Rapture!”

    I guess it’s surveillance for me!

  3. Cathy says:

    I know I’m late to this announcement, but I’ve been battling slow internet service. Before my upgrade, your site wouldn’t load. There you’d stare, unblinking, until I had to jump on task manager and shut you down. So yay — I think I can go back to being a harmless groupie from afar. I promise I don’t fit the pyscho bill, though you sent me a copy of “The Pyscho-Ex Game” when I won one of your shelf-cleaning extraganzas — hmm.

    As for your Facebook news, now I’m in a quandry. I was just thinking about pulling the plug on Facebook (I’m cyber-shy). Perhaps I’ll hang-in a bit longer.

    Anyway, congratuations on the book. I’ll be among the pre-orderers.

  4. Shira says:

    I’m very excited to hear that your book has a street datenow. I very much am looking forward to reading it!

  5. Barbara says:

    Thanks for your ongoing gift of sharing your experiences with readers, especially your relationships. My teenage daughter is the wiser for it. We are both looking forward to reading your new book, and are especially excited about learning How to Spot an Asshole.

    I have avoided Facebook up to now, but you being there will make the plunge worthwhile.

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