At long last: Rambutan

Posted in blog post on July 3rd, 2009 by Merrill Markoe
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Its the fourth of July weekend. What that used to mean to me, when I was single, was the beginning of the downhill slide to Christmas. Because July seemed to go by in such a rapid flash that the next thing I knew, it was the part of August where the fences for the Halloween pumpkin lots started going up.  Well, come on. They have to start in August because it takes at least 60 days to get ready for Halloween. Of course, once its Halloween, then its also basically the first day of the five months of Christmas. Happily,these days Christmas doesn’t cause me the same anxiety .  So I am starting the beginning of this fourth of July weekend by celebrating my new purchase from Trader Joe’s: Rambutan.Rambutan Thank God they are finally selling it.  Because we all didn’t really have enough choices for snacks before. “Not just sweet or tart or even a combination of the two, the Japanese ‘fifth flavor’ known as Umami.” is what it says on the back of the package. I don’t know if Umami is  the Japanese way of saying “Yo Mama.” But I can tell you what freeze dried Rambutan tastes like: A very old piece of toast and jam. Like if you made yourself some and got it all slathered up but had to run out of the house and forgot to eat it. Then a week later, you found it behind something and decided that you were so desperate for a hit of flavor that you would taste it, even though you knew better. Now with new freeze dried Rambutan,  you don’t have to wait that hellish week for the bread to turn an odd combination of sweet and spongy !   I don’t know if the big Rambutan shipment is selling but I do know the reason I own this pack is because I consider it part of my job, as a cataloguer of Americana, to make a point of trying to own one of every weird thing that goes up for sale in the supermarket.fresh pie 3

Which is why I also own a pack of this: Fresh Pie. What I like best about it is that: 1. Its not pie.  2. Its not fresh. 3. It’s not NOW. Well, I guess, strictly speaking, it is NOW. If you attempt the broadest most metaphysical definition of the word “It”.

Regardless, It is one of the things that I love about living in the U.S.of A. The endlessly weird stuff for sale at the market.

Well, its almost time for me to give the dogs their annual Fourth of July sedatives so they don’t all  have a nervous break down and try to jump through windows when the explosions start. Fourth of July is basically the most frightening night of the year for dogs. And repeated explanations of The Declaration of Independence doesn’t seem to make anyone feel better or calm anyone down.  Nevertheless, Happy 4th of July.

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