Narcissists Say the Darndest Things: Great Quotes by Narcissists

Posted in writing on November 25th, 2009 by Merrill Markoe
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This is a page on which I hope you, the person who knows an annoying narcissist, will contribute a little something. I am seeking a collection of great memorable quotes by the narcissist in your life. I want the quote that makes your head spin and your mouth hang open with its egomaniacal cluelessness; The quote that you fish out to tell your uncomprehending friends at dinner parties in order to better describe the problem you have had with this person.newyorker-cartoon

To get the ball rolling I will give a few examples. The first is from my own mother whose comment, after reading the first professional piece of writing that I finished, was “Well, I don’t happen to care for it but I pray I’m wrong.” A close second goes to her follow up reply, after a request that she withhold any more criticism if she wanted me to show her anything else; “No more criticism? If I can’t criticize you, what am I supposed to talk about? The weather?”

Another good example comes from a mother of someone I know who commented, after being told that her daughter was molested, “Oh my God! Do you think I was?”

Okay: Your turn.

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695 Responses to “Narcissists Say the Darndest Things: Great Quotes by Narcissists”

  1. Laura says:

    My father-in-law is an amateur painter. One day we were driving past a landscape he had painted from. He was very enthused and wanted to share it with us. As we approached, instead of pointing to the beautiful landscape, he instead pointed across the road and exclaimed, “Just imagine seeing me painting there!”

  2. Lance says:

    While trying to save her relationship with her father, my wife met with him and showed him literature on narcissistic personality disorder. After giving him a description of narcissistic behavior and urging him to read the symptoms of narcissistic personality disorder, he looked at my wife and said, “Now who are you saying has this, you or me?”

  3. Sheila says:

    In the middle of a nonstop conversation at the bar at Taboo in Palm Beach with a friend and the gentleman next to us interrupts us, talks about himself for 20 minutes straight and then says he “used to be a narcissist” but he actually trained himself not to be a narcissist. Thank God his phone finally rang or he would never have stopped talking about himself.

  4. Melissa says:

    While my house was in the middle of burning down, (I lived about 2 blocks away) as I am watching it, my mother runs up to me hugs me, tells me she was so worried, and then in the same breath begans to scold me for not doing the dishes after I had dinner over there a few nights before. I just looked at her in disbelief

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