New category: Pretty but horrible

Posted December 13th, 2009
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My first two nominees:

1. Sarah Palinsarah palin. No explanation needed. She defines the category.

2. Rainbow Twizzlers

rainbow twizzlers

I bought a pack of these yesterday because I love Twizzlers. And I love rainbows. But, as they say here on the internet: Fail. Whatever flavor that is in the regular ones (a flavor I like to think of as RED) is the only acceptable Twizzler . The purple is especially wrong. And I refuse to dignify the green or yellow with a discussion. While I was taste testing the other colors, I thought to myself “Pretty. But horrible.” Then I thought of Sarah Palin. Now I will build the rest of the category as the content occurs to me.

289704683_3dd8ca6d653. Air pollution at sunset

petit fours

4. Weird little inedible widely hated cake petit fours.(Thank you Ellen.)

5. Graphics for Grand Theft AutoGraphics for Grand Theft Auto

6. The always grotesque Speidi (Thank you Barb and Laurie)

Contributing Photographer

sno balls7. Hostess Sno Balls. Thank you Laurie. Again. This is a perfect one. As a kid I wanted so badly to love these because they were so beautiful and so theoretically delicious. Then you take a big bite of that rubbery spongy coating and…well, you never fully recover. Its not just awful, it represents the death of hope. It SHOULD have been a dream come true

8. Copper mining damage.copper mine pollution

9.. Elizabeth Hasselbeckelizabeth hasselbeck

10. Staph bacteriastaph bacteria

11.Boots with 5 inch heels. I can’t last more than a short period of time in 3 inch heels. 31/2 are out of the question. Once, for a TV appearance, I bought a pair of Manolo Blahniks. They were very pretty. I made it from the backstage area to the guest seat. Period. But I had to find a chair during the wait for a table at the restaurant afterward. Even a few minutes of standing in them was unbearable. They were so painful and so expensive that I took them to a shoe repair and had  the heel shortened, understanding completely what kind of a sacrilege that is…and of course it wrecked the careful architecture of the shoes,so I’ve never warn them since.  But I couldn’t wear them before either.

Now all the shoes I like have 4 and 5 inch heels. I love how they look but…they certainly fit my qualifications for this list.  Pretty but horrible.5 inch heel

4 inch

12. Sheet cake. Always pretty. Always horrible.sheet cake Thank you Elayne.

13. Mel Gibsonmel-gibson-smile